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On the other side of the doors, footsteps drift away. The bedding party has left. They have returned to the feast.
Now I truly am all alone with Prince Selwyn. I can’t look at him, I can’t. All I can do is stand here and stare at the polished floorboards. The air feels thick and heavy. The hiss of the candles as they burn, sounds far too loud. The smell of beeswax is strong. Time has slowed. Each breath takes a hundred years. I am supposed to say, How may I please you, my lord husband? But my tongue is firmly stuck to the roof of my mouth. If I had been married to a duke, there would have been a tea served to me at dinner. An aphrodisiac and sedative. Maybe I would have been served one tonight if Prince Selwyn had not whisked me away so very early in the evening. But that’s fine. Being drugged and addled would be awful. At least this way I have my wits about me. It makes me a little less vulnerable. “Laurie,” Prince Selwyn whispers softly. I look up. His mahogany eyes look so sad, and confused. “Why are you so scared?” “S… sorry,” I stammer. He stares at me for a long moment. Then, he picks up my hand. The one that is still tied to him with red ribbons, and will remain so until the druid cuts them in the morning. He places my hand on his firm chest, over where his heart would be if he were human. He places his hand on my chest, and the heat of him seeps through all my layers of silk. “Can you not feel it?” he says. I can’t feel anything, save for the intricate embroidery of his outer robe. He has far too many layers on for me to be able to feel his heart beating, if that is what he means. He even has a layer of soft leather, unlike me. He can probably feel the racing of my heart, but I cannot feel a thing. I stare up at him and bite my bottom lip. He stares back at me. Searching for something. Sadness swirls and grows in his eyes the more he looks at me. Eventually he sighs and drops his hand. I allow my hand to fall away too. Now we are no longer touching each other. The ribbon is the only thing connecting us. The weight of his gaze continues to bore into me. “The wedding needs to be consummated tonight in order to be binding. Healers will come in the morning and examine you.” I nod my understanding. I know he has to take me. Fey wedding customs aside, I am his vessel now. If he doesn’t untap my magic, it will be clear to everyone. “Yes,” I manage to say. “I understand. I have been trained for this. I know all the sixty-nine positions.” One of his elegant eyebrows lifts. “Sixty-nine positions?” Despite everything, my lips twitch. “Yes. It is a source of a great many crude jokes.” “I can imagine.” He stares at me for a moment longer. Then he walks away, over to a cabinet. He pours a golden liquid into a beautifully carved wooden goblet. He returns to me and hands me the goblet. I take it and gulp down the sweet liquid. Mead. Fermented honey. I can’t taste any drugs in it, but that means nothing. I look back up at him and wait to see what he wants me to do next. Selwyn frowns. “Getting you drunk will not help, will it?” It might. If he got me so drunk I passed out. He could simply arrange me on the bed in whatever way he saw fit. But my trainer said some men don’t like that. They want their consort to be conscious and aware. He takes the goblet from my lax fingers and sets it down on the floor. All while his eyes never leave mine. “May I see you?” he says softly. My heart slams against my ribcage. My body belongs to him now. He doesn’t need to ask. I nod weakly. He takes my wrists and guides me over to the bed. Gently, he sits me down on the edge. I swallow and stare unseeing straight ahead. His nimble fingers go to the laces at my neck. He tugs for a moment. Then he slides the soft silk of my robes off one shoulder. I shiver even though the room is not cold. His hand moves over my other shoulder. He pulls the silk lower until it slips off. Both of my shoulders are exposed. Out of the corner of my eye, my skin looks pale. Soft and smooth thanks to fey lotions. His finger runs down the curve of my neck and continues down, over the slope of my shoulder. The echo of his touch lingers all over my skin. He traces along my collarbone until he finds the thin silver chain of my brace. He pauses and pulls the brace out of the silks pooled at the top of my chest. “What is this?” I lick my lips. Surely it is obvious? Strips of leather wrapped around a three inch long piece of wood. “It is my brace.” Silence. I swallow. “It is… um… for biting on. Clenching between your teeth so you can remain silent and um… brace yourself.” All vessels have them. Or so I have always been told. A good vessel is a quiet vessel. His fingers move to the clasp. He undoes it and lifts the chain off my neck. The brace thuds on the floor. “I want to hear you sing for me.”
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Flyn. The Ferris wheel looms like a neon halo above the fairground, spinning slow and lazy against a velvet-purple sky. Lights blink along the spokes in cheerful bursts of color, and from where we're standing, I can just hear the creak of the seats swaying in the warm night breeze. It looks a little rickety. A little sketchy. Perfect.
"You sure about this?" Jade asks beside me, voice low but even. Calm on the surface. But I can see the tension in his shoulders, the way he keeps smoothing the hem of his shirt like he's trying not to bolt. "Absolutely," I say. "What, afraid of heights?" He lifts an eyebrow. "Afraid of being trapped on a glorified tin bench with you for twenty minutes, maybe." "Ouch. Wounded," I grin, because I can tell he isn’t being serious. He’s just nervous. But he steps forward with me anyway, joining the short line. There's a couple ahead of us making out like it's a competition, and Jade very studiously looks anywhere but at them. I stuff my hands in my pockets and try to act like my heart isn't doing that ridiculous rabbit thing. Because it's happening. A real moment. The kind you wait for without realizing you've been waiting. The ride operator waves us on. We climb into the seat, and it rocks under our weight. Jade sits stiffly, arms crossed, knees pointed forward like he's bracing for impact. I resist the urge to nudge his shoulder. Barely. Maybe I should have wedged Reginald the frog between us instead of squishing him on the other side, between me and the edge of the seat. He could have acted as chaperone. On second thoughts, I’m really glad that Reginald is out of the way. The wheel jerks into motion. The Ferris wheel creaks softly as we climb. The sounds of the fair grow muffled beneath us, laughter and music and the clang of game bells all turning into a kind of background static. I sneak a glance at Jade, who’s doing his best not to look nervous, one hand gripping the metal bar in front of us a little too tightly. “You doing okay?” I ask. “I don’t love heights,” he mutters. “Good thing you’ve got me, then.” He shoots me a look, but it’s got less bite than usual. “You’re not actually going to be helpful in an emergency, are you?” “Absolutely not. I’ll panic immediately and then offer you a snack.” That earns a snort. Victory. We rise slowly, the fairground dropping away beneath us in a patchwork of lights and noise. The air is cooler up here, the breeze tugging at my hair, brushing soft against the back of my neck. Beside me, Jade lets out a breath and finally, finally, relaxes a little. "Okay," he murmurs. "I get it. This is... nice." I smile and let my knee bump his. He doesn’t move away. The city sprawls out in the distance, blurred lights and silhouettes of buildings under the smudge of stars. I look at him, his face turned slightly into the wind, lashes dark against his cheek. He's gorgeous. And he doesn’t even seem to know it. “It’s kind of beautiful up here,” he says, and there’s something in his voice, something open. “Yeah,” I say, watching him. “It really is.” It’s cheesy as hell, but I literally can’t stop myself. It is like I’m momentarily possessed. By a demon who has watched far too many corny romance films. Jade eyes flick to mine. I don’t look away. Neither does he. Maybe saying it wasn’t so cringe after all. Thank you random demon. You’ve done me a solid and I owe you one. The moment stretches, electric and quiet. My heart stumbles. The rest of the world disappears. Then the wheel jerks to a stop. Leaving us swaying at the very top. Jade flinches, looks away, and the moment is lost. Damn it. "I used to sneak onto rooftops when I was a kid," I say, trying to fill the silence without breaking it. "Just to feel above everything. You know? Like, for a second, nothing could touch me." Jade glances at me, a shadow of a smile on his lips. "I can see that. You seem like the kind of person who'd chase the sky." I don't know what to say to that, so I grin instead. "And you? Ever get up to anything rebellious?" He huffs a laugh. "Define rebellious." "I'm thinking... late-night swimming in a hotel pool. Scaling a building. Running away to join a punk band." "No band," he says. "But I did steal a car once." I blink. "Seriously?" He shrugs, expression unreadable. "Not for long. Just a joyride." I want to ask more. I want to know everything. But I know that tone, the way he drops a truth like a stone into a lake and watches the ripples. It means, don’t dig. So I don’t. Instead, I say, "Well, now I feel boring. Want to steal this Ferris wheel together?" He snorts, and the sound makes something in my chest loosen. I love making him laugh. It is my new favorite thing. I think I want to do it forever and ever. The seat sways a little, and the fair below seems impossibly far away, tiny and bright and unreal. The wind brushes past us, warm and soft. Laden with the scents of summer. Jade turns to look at me. And suddenly, it’s quiet. Not the kind of quiet that feels empty, but the kind that holds its breath. The quiet that waits. A silence that pauses out of reverence for the moment. His gorgeous green eyes search mine. "Flyn," he says, barely above a whisper. I don’t know if he means it as a question or a warning. But I lean in anyway, slowly, giving him time to pull away. He doesn’t. Our lips meet. Soft. Careful. The first tentative brush of something we’ve both been pretending we don’t want. The kiss is soft, almost uncertain. Like he’s expecting to be pushed away. But I pull him closer. It’s not perfect. Our noses bump a little. He tastes like lemonade and nerves. My hand finds his, and he squeezes tight like he’s afraid I’ll vanish. And then… fireworks. No, really. Fireworks. Actual ones. Bursting in the sky just to the left of us, bright pinks and silvers and golds lighting up the night. We both laugh, breathless, pulling back just enough to see each other’s faces. “Did you plan that?” he says, voice shaky. “Obviously. I bribed the fair gods. Cost me a whole hotdog.” His eyes crinkle with something dangerously close to joy, and the sight of it lights up my entire soul. I swear I’m burning brighter than the fireworks. I’m iridescent and so very alive. We don’t kiss again. We sit in the soft rush of color and light, our fingers still tangled together, and I can feel the weight of the night settling around us. Not heavy, just… real. Like something has shifted. The fates have tied strands together in their weaving. Things are now fixed, set. Destinies are now bound. A glorious new future has been created. *Spoilers* |
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